She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
