OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
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