I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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