Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
