By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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