i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
What a dumb baby whore.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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