Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
