sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
