You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
a search helicopter?!
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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