i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
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