You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize