Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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