So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
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