come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
