I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Randomize
