yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
