i just had sex bonerless
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
