this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
