i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Randomize
