Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
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