Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
