I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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