Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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