I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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