I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
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I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
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Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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