I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
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