No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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