Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I accidentally had phone sex last night
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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