Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
