Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
