Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
and you fell through a lawn chair
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Randomize
