Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
