I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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