look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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