Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
