Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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