He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
