Buhtt sex?
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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