just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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