Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
