no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
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