I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
