Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (646): it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there http://tfl.nu/bxrn
  Replies (6) Good night (5188) Bad night (1272)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question. http://tfl.nu/ra0q
  Replies (17) Good night (6341) Bad night (1264)
• Favorite

  (863): View more from Florida

  oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (863): oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows. http://tfl.nu/dnld
  Replies (14) Good night (1355) Bad night (3034)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america. http://tfl.nu/yc3t
  Replies (7) Good night (3001) Bad night (853)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me. http://tfl.nu/o6eb
  Replies (6) Good night (2846) Bad night (747)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me http://tfl.nu/mnmv
  Replies (5) Good night (2661) Bad night (717)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it http://tfl.nu/vzev
  Replies (2) Good night (528) Bad night (1207)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication http://tfl.nu/j4oj
  Replies (11) Good night (1092) Bad night (623)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father http://tfl.nu/aa2i
  Replies (8) Good night (966) Bad night (383)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights" http://tfl.nu/0e71
  Replies (1) Good night (871) Bad night (456)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing. http://tfl.nu/acec
  Replies (2) Good night (364) Bad night (910)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Coming.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this. (504): Coming. http://tfl.nu/0nn7
  Replies (8) Good night (1367) Bad night (440)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic. http://tfl.nu/pqzx
  Replies (3) Good night (860) Bad night (345)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex. http://tfl.nu/3doz
  Replies (2) Good night (820) Bad night (435)
• Favorite

  (+48): View more from Poland

  It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+48): It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this. http://tfl.nu/tdnl
  Replies (6) Good night (507) Bad night (393)

Randomize