Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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