I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
