Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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