It's like a parade of train wrecks.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
