Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
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