She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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