dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I will be naked everywhere
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
