On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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