just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
